Kitty Stare-Down
Shitpancake and Sanji were having some sort of moment before they started swatting at each other again.
…Time for this week’s story…
Mr. Gratitude
“You need to be more grateful,” said the thin therapist in corduroys.
“Grateful? Doc, how is that going to fix anything? The only thing I’ve got to be grateful for is that I ain’t got more problems than the problems I got,” Donnie explained. The balding yet secure therapist pushed a pair of glasses up the bridge of his nose before responding.
“We’ve already significantly curtailed your cursing, which you said has helped with your anger. Earlier, you said you missed a deadline last week, but you learned a lesson from it. You are grateful for that lesson, and your world is less perturbed. In fact, that experience now fills you with positivity instead of self-loathing. So, how about we try gratefulness? Just as an experiment, for the next two weeks, be grateful for everything that happens to you. Like that missed deadline, find a thread of empathy or positivity and expand on that instead of the negativity.”
“Sounds silly. But, if I’m supposed to be grateful, thank you for the homework. I haven’t had homework since I was a little kid and life was happy and fun. Thanks so much, Doc. I hate it just as much as when I was a kid.”
“Nostalgic, isn’t it?”
“I guess.” Donnie rolled his eyes and the session ended soon after. He ventured into the world with gratitude churning through his mind. On his drive home, a bright red sports car cut him off, forcing him to slam on his brakes.
“Thank you, douchebag, for… something. I don't know what, but clearly, I need to be grateful for what a huge jerk you are. I don't know. Whatever. This feels stupid.”
Donnie continued thanking everything he could, no matter how mundane. It was not malicious compliance, just Donnie giving it his best effort. Still, his disbelief led to him badmouthing inanimate objects, like cursing at red lights and then thanking them for preventing accidents.
Days later, Donnie grabbed a coffee before work. After taking a drink, he almost spit it out. He spun around and marched back into the shop. He happened to complain to the barista who made his coffee. The apologetic young woman was sweet, but also seemed stressed and overburdened. So, Donnie tried gratitude.
“It's really not a big deal, thank you for being so nice about it. I came in a little hot. Your job is hard, these things happen.”
Her frantic momentum stopped. Her face melted. Tears trickled from the corners of her eyes. Wiping them away, she thanked Donnie, then told him she’d be back with his coffee. Thinking he said something wrong, Donnie was shaken. A minute later the woman returned with his coffee and a small paper bag.
“I saw you looking at these when you were ordering. As thanks for what you said.”
“Oh, thank you. Wow. That's really not necessary. I didn't say anything special,” Donnie said.
“Maybe not, but people can be really rude, and mean, and they don't appreciate anything. It may not have meant anything to you, but it meant a lot to me, so thank you.”
Confused and happy, Donnie left with a smile despite being behind schedule. Arriving at work, construction blocked his path.
“This sucks! Now, I have to go all the way around. But, thanks for fixing the roads, or whatever you guys were doin’ back there,” Donnie shouted to himself.
The detour took him to an intersection where an elderly woman struggled with her walker while crossing the street. Donnie realized the folly in watching her struggle while also being annoyed with her for being another obstacle on his way to work. Then, he remembered the barista and how much that small gesture meant to her.
Grumbling to himself, he turned on his hazard lights and politely approached the frail woman with short, curly white hair. A tire that kept getting stuck was holding her up, so he helped her across and carried her walker.
Ushering them to hurry, an impatient driver behind Donnie honked obnoxiously. Donnie and the driver shared vulgar words and gestures before the impatient man drove around Donnie’s car, which he could have done all along.
A tangle of hair was jamming the elderly woman's wheel. Donnie cut it loose and sent her merrily on her way. As a result, Donnie arrived late for work and was fired.
Donnie was devastated. Life always seemed to dish him the worst luck when he was just trying to do the right thing. He sat in his car cursing through tears and called a friend on his way home, asking if the gang could meet for drinks when they got off work.
A few hours later, Donnie was waiting at the bar. When his friends arrived, they rained joy on Donnie, affectionately rough. None of them seemed to care that he lost his job. When Donnie asked why they were all acting strangely, one of them pulled out their phone and played a video.
Someone had filmed Donnie helping the old woman cross the street. When Donnie flipped off the impatient driver. His friends laughed and patted him on the back.
“Wait, how did you get this?” Donnie finally asked.
“Bro!” His buddy Carl pointed to the view count in the corner of the screen. “You went viral!”
It took a while for Donnie's friends to explain what happened. They bought his drinks that night and discussed his options. They realized Donnie had all the skills and now the reputation to get a job at a retirement home.
Donnie got a lot of satisfaction helping people, and the residents adored him. Being appreciated made him happy, and strangers treated him better when they recognized him. Thanks to his newfound perspective of gratitude, the problems that once caused him great stress rolled off his back effortlessly.